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Sunday, February 17, 2013

Eventful Weekend

The successful weekend is one that should always be remembered. This was one of them. One of my boys was talking to his friend and what their parents do. Oddly enough, mine says his dad is a stand up funny man unless he eats to much, then he sits. The kid said his mom worked at the bowling alley, and that's when I piped up, oh she can wax a hardwood and polish balls? Is she single and have big boobs? Obviously not the material a 7 year old knows. Right over his head.
I did learn Girl Scout cookies are awesome meal replacements and only $3.50 a box compared to a $7.99 happy meal with cold fries. But, who's counting? So, we went to Walmart, hungry, real damn hungry I guess, we only bought food that had a preparation time of less that 5 minutes, and we know we were hungry cause we don't live in Colorado. Got to meet a bike gang dude, long hair, braided with Ponch off CHIPS glasses, rolled up cigs in his sleeve, leather jacket and pants. I started to talk to him, I always really wanted to know why bikers try to be the crypts and bloods. He said it is a brotherhood, family, like a marriage. All I said was sounds like Arkansas or West Virginia. And obviously, that wasn't the thing to say to him.
We did learn that we should just swing by McDonald's instead of driving home and then getting food ready. So I got up to the speaker, they asked if they could help me like always. I gave them, "I.....nee....fri......che....arg....." In which I got a sir, we must be having problems with our speaker, can you pull up to the first window please? And errrrrr, I was there. She wanted to help, but I said, "ain't no problem with the speaker, every time I come here you fuck up my order so I thought I would start it off right from the beginning. You can bet your sweetass I got all my order that time. Oh yes I did, and a couple coupons so I can come back for them to fuck it up more.
The moral of the story is pretty good all in all. Some people think your an ass, but others think your just an asshole. Really, God loves me so much he has a picture of me in his wallet. I did receive a phone call from my kids friends dad asking about his mom's boobs. Whooops. I said oh my bad, maybe she is more like a rental shoe from the bowling alley, fill her to capacity, got her warm and smelling good, and handed her back to ya. And that, was strike 3. I didn't learn a damn thing other than I should have not been silly and wrapped ole Willy 7 years ago.