I want to be a dog

If I could chose to be anything other than a human, I would be a dog. I could sniff crotches, hump legs and chicks would think it was funny. you don't have to worry about going to work, calling in, our anything other than meeting the mailman.
You go outside and poop, pee, come inside and get told good boy, and you get a treat. You can lay under a table and sneak a peek up skirts, let a fart and watch everyone run.
But you never see a dog run up to his bowl and say gosh, better not eat, I need to watch my hips. When your feeling frisky, you just run over and get some, no spending money on her, courtship, flowers, our any of that, just a good ole doggy style and run home. So she has a litter, like they are going to nail you for child support? NOT!!!!
But the one reason I would love to be a dog is so when the parents are getting it on in bed, I can sneak up and touch my cold nose on their ass and laugh like hell!!!!!!

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