SUH

Mr. Suh,
I am just so sorry that you thought you were pushed and had to step on another players arm. I must of missed that buffalo, the only animal that could move you, in the TV screen. I actually didn't even see anyone around that had the balls to push you. And I am sorry they were talking about bad things you didn't like on the O line, but eating grass is one thing, you really didn't have to keep trying to get the camel to drink more water.
I know you understand that millions of kids are watching you and today was the international step on your friend and say you were pushed day. We named it after you, why because you are the real deal.
But to come from a school that the world watches and being a great player from that Husker Nation, you really didn't earn any KUDOS stating that you were pushed. So, I thought maybe I could help you out tomorrow with some ideas on what to tell the public and the commissioner.

I am really sorry I was bashing his head in the ground, but I forgot my terrets medication before the game.
I really didn't mean to step on his arm, I wanted his damn chin so he would stop talking smack.
I am a man that respects my mother and anyone going to talk smack about my mom will go down. That is my button, don't push it.
I would like to express to the Packers that I am sorry I singled out player than the whole team in which I know I could take out.
I am the greatest Defensive lineman that the NFL has right now, that punk saying I wasn't going to the pro bowl again pissed me off.
I am sorry fans, I had a bad case of the craps from stopping at taco bell before the game, and really needed to take a day off.

But all in all SUH, just a damn SORRY after the game, instead of saying you were hit and pushed by a damn alien would have sealed the deal for us people. And please stop playing dirty, we in Nebraska get dirty, but from preg checking cattle man.
Stay tough, stay strong and build your respect back up.

Sincerely,
Husker "SUH" Fan