Funny Things

Why is it when someone gets scared we laugh? Why is it that when we go to scare a person, we all of a sudden have to pee when we hide?
Who decided one day that they were going to invent a tampoon?
Have you ever thought about these? Its the damnest thing you ever did think of. When someone is scared off their butt, we laugh ours off. I really don't understand how me seeing a snake and screaming like a BITCH is all that funny. I could have had a damn heartattack and laid there like a fish out of water all the while that you are standing over me laughing your butt off. Sometimes there are things you need to think about before laughing at a person that just pissed their pants. Like what if that was you?
And then, during paybacks, I hide in a great spot and know I can get them back and make them as scared as I was. I get all into place, controling my breathing like a rattlesnake fixin to hit a mouse, and DAMN I GOTS TO PEE. I sure didn't have to pee when I was thinking about doing it, or when I was getting into position, but all be darn, as soon as I'm there thinking of them pissing and pooping their pants a little, I have to pee. Now, I am going to be the one that pisses his pants and if I don't get them back for them to piss, I am going to look as out of place as a hooker in Catholic Mass.
And what would make one think of making a big cotton motor and deciding to jam that up in a whole and extend out bigger than baseball and use baling twine to yank that puppy out like a teatherball. I mean, you ever dropped one of them bad howards in a toilet bowl? It sucks up all the water and gets gigantic. How do I know? Well, it was man that invented the lock on the bathroom door so we could explore different crap. Every man has read the instruction manual that comes in the tampoon box behind locked doors. We aren't as dumb as we lead on. Well, now that I got your attention, don't be silly wrap ole willy.