Facebook FOOD

You know to think about it, the Arch Dictator in the White House has brought
about change in this fine world of ours according to exercise. I am totally shocked
the knothead don’t have Facebook, and if he does, then I say tag that man in a
bunch of pork recipes on Facebook! It sure seems like change is coming, I didn’t
mind the pictures, the funny e-cards, and now, really?!? I have to sit there and
look at some concoction of an eagle headed warrior instead of drooling over
duck lips on some half naked chick like I normally do? We might as well just
do a YouTube push and get it all out in the damn open there Zuckerman,. Why
don’t we just play the same ad’s like they have on TV? I was thinkin’ we had
Facebook sos’ we could talk, meet up, hang out, and enjoy some laughs, but
now all of a sudden some escaped hen from the Pintrest party has moved her
pin me junk over to good old Facebook… it’s like the old game of Pin the tail on
a damn donkey and now I got me food recipe’s posted all over and instead of
my Duck faces on Facebook! If this wasn’t a crime yet I’m a gonna recommend
to my congressman that it should be! After all, It’s about time he did something
constructive anyways right?!?
Now as you may or may not know, I’m currently and plan to be a bachelor.
Like most of us, the only oven we know how to operate is of the MICROWAVE
variety… matter fact, seems to me that’s the ONLY oven one even needs, that
I can recon anyways… Now on the other hand, If I wanted one of those nice
looking gourmet meals, I would go out to eat at the Sam’s Club deli like everyone
else! But when I’m sittin’ on my fat ass here in my Laz-z Boy simply cause I’m
not going to let our fine government tell me what I have to do for exercise, the
last thing I want to see is some Pampered Chef whipped up dinner in a crock-pot
bubbling over like a drunk guy that missed his spittoon.
Now to be sure there are a few things that crack me up, but there’s also some
things that get me more riled up than a car thief who forgot his cell phone in the
stolen car, and perhaps (for me at least) this must be one of them. It’s got me so
riled up my hair has even turned red from my face getting so flushed up! So off I
go to suck the soul from whoever I can find that posts that crap on my Facebook
page. Jus you wait till I find em’!
You know, Oddly enough, the more I think about it, maybe I should start a
movement, matter o fact, it probably took me more calories to hit the delete
button than it did to read your dang recipe you slapped on my screen, I really
may be onto something here... Well, screw it, I guess I’ll just go back to find the
duck lipped half naked chick that thinks she’s all that and a bucket of chicken,
(when actually , it takes more than 8 beers to even have her resemble her
profile pic). So, if you want to jump on the bandwagon and join me in this little
campaign, let’s get to it!, But just in case you’re not, don’t be silly n’ wrap ole
willy! (and by the way, good luck with findin’ that perfect chick that matches her
profile pic.

pictures

So to the vast majority of single females, the reason for owning a webcam is a part time job. They take all these silly pictures, Patty them on Facebook, and think us guys won't find out they have a part time gig.
Well, the purple head gives it away. It sticks out worse than a viagra pill in an seldom bottle. But some of those girls are way to good looking to be just sitting at home alone.
So therefore, they need a social life, that's when a buddy with a hot tub inside his house comes in handy.
Invite her over to his place, watch some football while she's doing what all women would do and sit in the tub. Little does she know when she gets out, the house is going to feel like a fireplace, and off goes the clothes.
Now to make her really feel at home, pull out the video camera, then say, gosh you don't even have to run this webcam. If she gets mad and stomps out, make sure your a true friend and toss her a box of batteries out the door. So purple heads on Facebook aren't all bad you just have to know how to approach them.

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