My eye,,,,balls.

I'm just sitting here as bored as a 4 year old sitting thru a sermon. Of course I am off work today, and can finally see good enough to see the computer. Well, I had a case of pinkeye in my eye, duh hints pink eye, that turned into virus infection on the ball, and had to have my eye scraped yesterday. It was kinda cool, I got me a ride to the VA and up I went, sat in the chair, just getting done eating garlic, cause it was the eye dr and that's how I roll. Burping onions, and eating garlic makes a lasting impression on the eye dr. But anywho,
I just sat there and got my balls numbed, with some drops, and being me, I said my cheek was getting numb too just to freak him out. But, obviously he knows me and just laughed. One day I am really going to have a problem, and the Dr. will laugh, not funny. But then he so gently took some tweezers and scraped all this eye snot, or boogers, down and picked them off both balls. It was kinda like formunda cheese looking stuff. Formunda cheese is the cheese you find from unda these nuts, but anywho, it was kinda gross.
So in the mean time from scratching my balls, in my eyes, I got some drops that have steriods, so I have been working out my balls with them. Maybe if I make these roids worth it, I can have BIG HAZEL eyes, instead of these chinese, blind me with dental floss eyes I'm stuck with. So, off I go, time to work out my balls, and in the mean time, if you are working your balls, don't be silly wrap ole willy.

Pinkeye?

I woke up with a piece of sand in my damn eyeball, or maybe it was a seed, well anyways, there was something in my damn eye. So, off to the mirror I went, and yep, I am still so sexy the mirror whistles at me. I didn't find a damn in my eye, so, doing what normal men do, I RUBBED it,,,,my eye damn it. Not the thing to do, for some reason, it made it itch worse, and turn all red, and some poop was coming out of it. The poop,,,
WTF, who decided that poop in the eye is the cause of pinkeye? That is stupid, that's as dumb as an old man with one leg trying to play soccer. I have not, will not, do not, have shit in my eye. There is no way, I ain't a dog, so I cant take my tongue down there to play. God, could you imagine if we could? Holy crap, I would have to work from home. For all my life I knew God was teasing us when me made it so we only get within 3 inches of it. Okay, dang it, now I'm as excited as a armless guy getting his new prostetic.
Well, the good thing is Dr. said there was no shit in my eye, but then he added, no shit in either eye, but you got yourself some pink eye. Then he sated that clymedia is also a cause, hummmmm, how would doc know I'm a male whore? Just like Facebook knows I watch porn, just like a cooler, keeping hot stuff hot and cold stuff cold, how does it know?
Well, so now I got some drops for the swollen up eye, I look like I got hit in the eye by a hooker I forgot to pay. Obviously,,,,no tip either. But, don't be silly wrap ole willy.