Money Maker

I've done alot of cool things in my time, ie porn, cliff diving. But one of my bestest ideas was to come up with yard darts. I got so tired of them kids throwing rocks at cars in my front yard, I had to plant up an apple tree so they had something different to toss. That worked well, until I found out how to make apple pie. That stuff is good, and just make sure you get all the worms out of the apples first, for some reason my city slicker kids don't like worms.
The greatest hit in my trailer park is when I stopped and got some corn in a field, and then told my neighbor kid that my toiet was broken and gave him some pliers to get the seats off his toilets and bring them over. So, he did, being a smart kid and believing me. I took some of that corn, and pulled the husks back to make a yard dart, and took the toilet seats out and taught them how to throw some yard darts. I boiled up the rest of the corn, so I could I have big shindig down at trailer 68 at the park.
That was a great night until old PattyMae decided that the fieldcorn gave her the trots and took off for her toilet and we all heard a GREAT BIG,,,,BILLYBOB DAMN IT< BRING ME BACK MY SEAT AND FAST!!!! We just laughed, and I told ole BillyBob lets see how hard that corn hit, keep playing son. So we played. Wasn't long, ole PattyMae came out and was as mad as a elephant in a cage by himself on Viagra. WHEW, that red hair started flashing. I tried to ease the moment by asking to see if the toilet left a ring on ass, that obviously was not the thing to say.
So what I learned that day, what is fun for the kids, turns funny for the parents, but to my surprise ends me in 2 black eyes and swollen shins. I also learned, don't etch your name in your tools if some kids going to leave them behind. That's like breaking in a car leaving a business card. Damn it, I never think of the little things.

Trailer park

Ever notice when you pull into a town the first thing you see is the trailer park? So everyone knows, they are future walmart door greeters. From the welcome to my town to walmart, way to move up toothless tina.
And when the fair comes to town, they will bop your ass to get a close parking spot to ride the rides and but that fried food from their cousins. That's the one week they take off for vacation, if they have jobs, other wise they are down at ready cash witting a check. Hot damn, we are going to hang out tonight.
I love fair week, its the only week of the year I know all those trailer parkers are not home, so I can go and reclaim my shit that got stollen all year long. And then I go into the trailer wheel business down at the lake for a month to make extra cash. Yep, they don't need them wheels on their house anyways, heck it cost money to drag that thing down the road.
Only in a trailer park can you find new cars, stolen shit, illegal guns, food stamps, and antiques all on 8 wheels. Life is a highway, they dream of cruising.
But long live the day I have some lots to rent to them. They get behind on lot rent, they better know how to fish, cause their house is going on pontoons and going to be a house boat where the lots are free. I will back that thing up down at the dock and wish them well.
But until I have my lots, I guess I will just keep getting my shit back, and selling tires down at the lake. But one day, maybe I can own the lot the walmart greeter lives on so we can be friends.

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