One night, while listening to my THONG SONG, I got to dancing, flipping on and off the lights, and doing some fancy WWE moves. I had this thought of pretending to be superman, and it did not end well at all.
From hitting the lights, being spot blinded, stubbing my toe on the bedside table, causing me to jump up and down, and then hitting myself in the head with the ceiling fan, which inturn caused me to go off kelter and jump sideways right onto the bedpost groin first.
Talk about laid out. I learned that night that just common items in the room can cause more havic on ones body than a damn mower with an ex wife behind the wheel. So, my idea of fixing this situation, was throw out the thong after I got all my butthair unwound off it. I replaced my light with the clapper, took my kids swimming noodle and cut slits in the thing to wrap my fan blades and then duct taped nerf footballs on the bedpost. I am a genuine fix it man.
As for the end table, I no longer have it, I have a dresser so that gives me more room to play around. I'm all healed up now thanks to frozen peas, popsicle sticks, and scotch tape. I am as good as new, and thankfully that night, I didn't even hurt my camcorder.
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